Phystus

The 1st Edition of AD&D had tons of variations on polearms. To be fair, history has seen a lot of different versions of sharp-thing-on-a-stick, but it seemed like AD&D tried to come up with statistics for every single one of them.

The other day I was watching a video, and for some reason it made me think of that.



So I just had to make my own lyrics...

Ain't no Glaive Gonna Hold My Guisarme Down

There ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down
There ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down
When I hear that polearm sound
I'm gonna get up off the ground
Ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down

Well I fought an orc with a ranseur,
And one with a big bardiche
I killed the one with the halberd 'cause he ain't got no reach

There ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down
There ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down
When I hear that polearm sound
I'm gonna get up off the ground
Ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down

Well look down the dungeon hallway
What do you think I see?
A guy with a bec de corbin, a-coming after me

There ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down
There ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down
When I hear that polearm sound
I'm gonna get up off the ground
Ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down

Well meet me mister meet me,
Meet me in the middle of the yard
And if my poleaxe fails me, I'll hit you with a fork-fauchard

There ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down
There ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down
When I hear that polearm sound
I'm gonna get up off the ground
Ain't no glaive, gonna hold my guisarme down